Stumbling upon your partner in a moment of self-pleasure can be quite a shock. This scenario, more common than you'd think, often stirs up a whirlwind of questions and intense emotions.
Why do people masturbate when they’re in a relationship?
Masturbation is often linked to solitude or singledom, yet it has a significant role in a thriving relationship.
Masturbation, even when in a relationship, offers numerous benefits for health and sexuality. It aids in understanding one's own body and desires better. By taking the time to explore your erogenous zones and grasp what brings you pleasure, you can guide your partner and enhance the quality of your sexual encounters. Masturbation also benefits physical and mental health. It helps reduce stress, improve sleep quality, and boost the immune system. Emotionally, it fosters self-confidence and self-esteem.
Contrary to popular belief, masturbation in a relationship isn't a threat, but rather a little something extra. Everyone has individual needs and desires that can sometimes be fulfilled through masturbation. It can also address differences in libido or life rhythms between partners, without questioning love or attraction within the relationship.
Discussing masturbation openly within a relationship can even strengthen intimacy and trust. It opens the door to conversations about each other's desires and fantasies, fostering a more fulfilling and harmonious sex life.
How to react when you catch your partner masturbating
When you're ready to discuss it with your partner, ensure you adopt a compassionate attitude and avoid making them feel guilty. Masturbation is a natural and personal practice, and inducing guilt can harm trust and intimacy in the relationship. Steer clear of blame and judgement, and instead prioritise listening and sharing.
How to broach the topic with your partner
When initiating the discussion, use positive and non-accusatory language. Instead of starting with accusations or judgements, phrase your sentences to convey understanding and openness. For example, saying "I'd like to talk about something that surprised me" is more constructive than "Why are you doing this behind my back?"
How to incorporate masturbation into your sex life as a couple
First, explore the world of sex toys and erotic accessories together. Sex toys can be a fun and exciting way to discover new sensations and spice up your sex life. Take time to choose toys together that appeal to both of you, and don't hesitate to use them during your intimate moments.
Lastly, incorporate masturbation into your foreplay and sexual encounters. Using masturbation as a form of foreplay can awaken the senses and prepare your bodies for sex. During intercourse, it can prolong pleasure or explore different simultaneous sensations.
By exploring sex toys together, trying mutual masturbation, and incorporating it into your intimate moments, you can discover new aspects of your sexuality and relationship.